The impetus for this site was the fascinating amount of rather useless unsolicited advice I have received since graduating from graduate school.  Mind you, dear readers, I have been a proud M.A. recipient for an apparently gasp-worthy two weeks.  Before I could even take a moment to exhale from the painful amount of work that went into receiving that degree (not to mention, concurrently interning and doing research), I was verbally bludgeoned by friends, family, and acquaintances.

Those who were succinct and clear about my direction told me I should write a book, open a tattoo removal business, consult to pharmaceutical companies regarding clinical trials, be a clinical psychologist, and apply to be a notary. Then there were the bizarrely nebulous suggestions that proved to be the most useless such as: work for a nonprofit, narrow down my research interests, expand my interests, publish something, go out on my own, and go volunteer somewhere.   By and large, the most common piece of unsolicited advice I received was, “You should go back to school. With the economy the way it is right now, it’s a good time to be in school. Ride it out.” These individuals seem to ignore the fact that I just finished doing exactly that.

The odd part of all this is not the ineffectual advice.  The advice itself is irrelevant. I think any grad student can attest to being the recipient of unwarranted career recommendations that tend to be immaterial to your end goal.  The business people tell you to get out of academia, the academics tell you to get more research experience, the researchers tell you to get more published, and your mom tells you to get some sleep.   What is relevant is why people seem to be soliciting advice.  Is there an implication that those who finish graduate school without a job are directionless? That we are wandering aimlessly in unemployment? That we are acting as leeches on the economy?  I am not sure.

It is amazing to me, though, how few unsolicited advice-givers have stopped to ask me what my degree is actually in or why I went to graduate school in the first place. These bits and pieces of information just might be relevant…in the meantime, I am off to research becoming a notary…

With soggy butter-drenched popcorn in right hand and over-priced ticket in the left you meandered to your seat with the knowledge that the next ninety minutes will be filled with a nationalistic plotline coupled with more than a smattering of CGI.  The lights dim, the music commences, and on the screen enters the blue protagonist.

Except rather than Captain America, you find Papa Smurf.  In 3-D.

No, no.  You did not just enter the wrong movie theater.  This is the film you will be seeing regardless of your intention.

While a fictional hypothetical, this premise too often becomes the reality for ambitious over-achievers willing to take on massive student loan debt.  The student only realizes he is in the wrong movie and cannot get out until it is way too late.

It is not uncommon for law students to take out over $150,000.00 to pay their tuition.  The schools justify this rate by advertising that the “average” starting salary can be well over $100,000.00 with many first year associates beginning at $160,000.00.  Even accepting the notion that every law student will graduate with the highest paying firm job, paying off this debt is not easily within reach to all.

For instance, the places with these high salaries correspond with the highest costs of living: New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, and Washington, D.C.  Now because of the tax bracket, the government automatically takes forty percent or sixty four thousand.  This leaves nearly $100,000.00 in disposable income, which is an impressive amount of money.

For arguments sake, it is exceedingly possible for an attorney to have expenses of $45,000.00 (i.e. $1,800/month for rent, $1500/month for cable, food, metro card, etc., and a $5,000 for trips, travels, weddings and gifts).  This leaves $55,000.00 to pay off loans, which could theoretically be paid off in three years—if you budget accordingly, i.e. taking it easy on the destination hen nights and stag parties.

The problem, though, is that it often does not reflect the reality for most young attorneys.   First, one must also take into account that most attorneys fortunate enough to enter Big Law do not stay very long.  Second, most law students fail to obtain these jobs in the first place.  For example, at Georgetown’s law school, ranked in the top 14, only 38% of their graduates landed employment at the nation’s largest firms, which paid the highest salaries.  The other 62% inevitable took jobs that received wages much lower. Furthermore, interest starts accruing from graduation whether you are ready to pay or not.  Therefore, one might need to pay back $150,000 when only receiving a $50,000 salary working for the Manhattan District Attorney’s office, which is an incredibly prestigious and difficult position to attain.

As a toddler, Hefty Smurf’s brawn and charisma with the ladies (or lady) appealed to my tot sensibilities.  Upon entering grade school, my tastes became more sophisticated (or at least relatively so) as this country’s great nationalistic comic characters penetrated my mind and imparted in me its ideals.  My only hope is that before obtaining a significant amount of debt that cannot be discharged through bankrtupcy, young attorneys make decisions that will not financially cripple them; and therefore, uphold the American Dream that Captain America fought so hard to preserve.  Student debt works for some, but certainly not all.

While American education is currently attacked from those that believe American children are either pushed too hard or not enough, this week Lisa Miller analyzed the importance of raising a global kid.  Her examination detailed the benefits that can be gleaned from American students immersing themselves in other cultures in order to stay competitive with the rising Eastern nations.  The article provocatively illustrated how some American families were living abroad for years at a time in order to acculturate their children.

Reflecting upon my year abroad, I concur with Ms. Miller’s assessment that young adults can gain a great deal from cultural immersion.  Living in an international city, even in an educational environment, forces each person to develop coping mechanisms and resiliency as it relates to working with others that are different from oneself.  The lessons and relationships that can be built from these experiences last a lifetime because they force the expansion of one’s comfort zone.

As a result, my suggestion is to follow what many students do in Europe either before entering college or the working world, and take a gap year or a period of time to work, travel, volunteer, or study abroad.  This will enable the next generation to do two things: (1) escape the rigors of perfecting the resume for a substantial period of time; and (2) to engage with people of different cultures in order to maintain American competitiveness for years to come.  These gains can come in many different ways, both in the classroom, at work, or as my Parisian classmate found out, after hours.

While the speaker was subjecting his classmates to self-deprecation, his larger point should serve as a noteworthy message, we are not inherently exceptional.  The problem with the educators of our generation, our parents and teachers, is that this country’s young and well-educated now believe that they can and will achieve regardless of miniscule rates of success.

Case in point, a friend of mine called me for advice the other day about attending a preeminent law school ranked by the only publication that apparently matters, U.S. News and World Report, in the top twenty.  By all accounts the school is truly a great legal center with top minds teaching to our nation’s neophyte lawyers.  The problem with this school, and ostensibly all legal education today, is that the opportunity costs to attend probably only make sense to those that graduate at the top of their class and land the Big Firm job with its accompanying six-figure salary.  In this particular instance, that would mean the top twenty percent.  When one considers that tuition remains upward of one hundred and fifty thousand dollars and that three years spent in the library usurps the ability to collect a paycheck, one realizes that these costs are real.

My friend has excellent credentials graduating from one of the finest private liberal arts colleges in the nation and spending the last four years in public relations.  He has the ability to out-perform eighty percent of his classmates, but he must also recognize that his classmates matriculate with comparable grades, board scores and experiences.  Every person believes that they will be in that coveted percentile.  Few will actually succeed.

This is not to say that my friend should not to attend this law school.  I am as warm-blooded an American as exists and I certainly believe in choice and free will.  What I am saying is that we should rethink our thought process before making these decisions.  Rather than hubristically thinking one can achieve coveted status, such as the top twenty percent, because of an innate specialness, one can ask, Is this what I want to do if I fail to achieve this particular benchmark.  If “no” is the answer, maybe a different path could be found.  Ultimately, introspective questions such as this might allow oneself to find something enjoyable, fuel a passion; and yes, maybe even be special at it.

-Michael Gordon is a baseball enthusiast with great taste in white wine.  He has an infallible record when it comes to choosing where to have the best Sunday brunch

Yet, any innocent situation (dinner party, wedding, generic family event) is liable to erupt into an interview where “What is your major?” is followed by a feigned sincere, “Oh, so what are you going to do with that?”  Your answers purportedly represent (or raise flags about) your intelligence, marketability, and ability to eventually attain self-sufficiency and financial stability etc etc etc. And the euphemism game ensues.

Business majors are promptly endowed with positive qualities such as ambition, level-headedness, and financial savvy.  Poli-si and history majors are assumed to be applying to law school. A psych major implies you don’t know what you want; and everything else typically points to, as my parents and their peers like to say, “you’re lost.”

I recently heard someone say, “In the real world you can change majors all the time.”  The verity behind those words is ironic considering we, as a society, focus so intently on choice of major as a predictor of future success.  In today’s world, college is not the ticket to your career the way it once was.  It is no longer a novelty. It is a prerequisite for hiring, in most industries, but it certainly is not the golden ticket.

Soon social norms will catch up with society in understanding that the immediate applicability of your major to your career is not what matters and does not mean all is lost.  College, in America at least, is synonymous with emerging adulthood.  The point is not the accumulation of obscure facts or to become knowledgeable in a recondite field, but rather social and emotional development.

So, the answer in most cases to the “What are you going to do with that degree?” question is, quite simply, “nothing.” Frankly, while it evokes fear and worry from parents, the problem is not the answer (“nothing”); the answer is true.  The problem is the question.

-Margo Aaron

On a certain level, they are invariably related. Experiences form our skills and values which, in turn, inform our actions. It is a linear progression. Then again, anything in retrospect can sound linear.  Hindsight is 20/20.  You can always make sense of your decisions in the past. You have context and outcome to use to justify your path.

In the midst of these changes, it’s not so simple. Often the decisions you make are not linear.  New opportunities arise, economic climates change, your priorities change, you have a family, you move, you age.  The vertical heights you will achieve later in life are not yet in sight. And the ones staring you in the face might be limiting.  Sometimes, to get a better view, you need to move laterally, shift left or right.  Readjust, refocus, redirect.

It is much more palatable to think of your career linearly, but it isn’t always realistic. This woman had her doctorate and ultimately discovered she was an entrepreneur.  She did not limit herself by reaching for the highest she could go in one field (academia), she reached out and tested the waters in a few others (business).  Just as we grow with age, as should our careers. It seems that reaching vertically is limiting.  It can’t always lead us to the highest place we can go.

- Margo Aaron

Now, to be clear, I am not claiming to agree with this man’s comments.  Quite the contrary on most accounts.  However, he raises points about our education system that call into question the implicit “Truths” we never question that will entreat your attention, like a car crash you can’t look away from.  You will feel a mix of emotions ranging from anger and disagreement to vindication and enlightenment.

Whether you agree or disagree is not the point.  What matters is that you take the time to ask yourself the questions in the first place

Enjoy:  College Education – A credential you don’t really need?

-Margo Aaron

Since we had become acquainted, my friend regarded Americans with only one thing: contempt.  I never really disagreed with her points about Americans. As a group, we are obnoxious, inappropriate and embarrassing, and value things like this.  Personally, these defining features of our culture are why I wear my citizenship with pride, but my non-American friend was new to our unique level of disrespect and ridiculousness. I couldn’t blame her for her haughtiness.

So, for her to give us one of the greatest compliments a person can give a country by staying here legally (economic contributions, obviously), was a shock.  Why would she subject herself to such debasement?

“Yes, Americans are ethnocentric morons, but America – it truly is the land of opportunity.  You don’t have this kind of opportunity anywhere else. Really,” she looked me straight in the eye, “you don’t.”  I was stunned.  Not because I second-guessed our awesomeness, but because this American-loathing foreigner was confirming our ethnocentric bias.  And she was right.

We are the home of the rags to riches story (Exhibit A).  Where else can youtube sensations become teen heartthrobs? Where blankets can become clothing options? And birds can become weapons of mass destruction? The Land of Opportunity.

-Margo Aaron

Non-peer pressure is exactly what it sounds like, pressure from non-peers.   Non-peers can include family members, teachers, family friends, coaches, American culture, the government, the media, and Chuck Norris.  It is far more perilous than peer pressure because it comes from everyone, everywhere, and in every form.

It is in the small-talk at dinner when family friends ask casually, “So, what do you do?”  It is in that look your grandmother gives you when she notices you still don’t have a husband. In the saleswoman’s catty glance at your outfit. In your boss’s tendency to promote only those employees he can talk about golf with. In your teacher’s nonconstructive criticism on your essay.

Instances like these and more can cause us to question our trajectory. Today’s world is a cesspool of pressures.  Achievement pressures, social pressures, sartorial pressures, pressure to have the right job, the right apartment (and then house), the right car, the right girlfriend, the right hobbies, the right degrees, the right school, the right dinner plans, the right hair, the right discussion topics, the right interview skills, the right outfit, the right salary, the right job, the right life.  With all these pressures, how do we endure?

We endure by being ourselves in spite of the pressures.  We endure by remembering that for a majority of these issues, there is no right or wrong, no good or bad.  There is only different. In the end, you have to do what is right for you.  That is how you deal with non-peer pressure.

And to think, all your friend Janie wanted to do was smoke a little pot. sigh.

-Margo Aaron